If you have kids you may have heard the term ghosting.It’s what people do when they don’t want to respond for what ever reason. They disappear just like a ghost.
Sadly my clients and I are seeing this personally with vendors, colleagues, and prospects. I sort of understand this with kids because they don’t have the tools to handle conflict, but adults?!?
When I teach conflict resolution one of the options is avoidance and it can work in some situations but.there is a down side
|Keeps you out of situations where your involvement will only result in negative outcomes for you||Allows conflict to grow (snowball effect)|
|May keep you from harmful influence of others||Sets the stage for a bigger explosion later|
|Buys some time (may give you the opportunity to collect information to use when you later address the conflict)||Keeps any “real” solution from being found|
|Attention can be paid to other more important issues||Causes others to perceive that you don’t care|
|Keeps you distant from issues others can manage without your involvement||Leaves the impression that you can’t change|
|Reinforces the notion that conflict is bad and should be avoided|
|When to Use||When Not to Use|
|Issue is not important to you||Safety or ethical issues are involved that might harm you or others|
|Issue will not affect whether the deal goes through||The relationship is not at risk or in any jeopardy|
|Issue is too emotionally charged and could damage the relationship, need space to “cool down”|
Take a look at the chart, the item that stands out is causes others to believe you don’t care. If you are a vendor who doesn’t return calls or e-mails why should I want to buy from you? Perhaps you are a prospective client, how hard is it to openly say I appreciate all you have offered and perhaps down the road but I am not buying now. We have all met the people who want to get together to see how you can help each other but don’t follow-up on dates. I used to work with a company that didn’t return supplier calls because they couldn’t pay the whole invoice. That was solved by creating a weekly payment plan..
How do you deal with ghosts? Has it changed how you market yourself? How you network? I look forward to reading your suggestions and comments.